At approximately 21:00 hours on Friday June 20th, I went to see The Happening before anyone could ruin it for me. At 05:00 hours on Saturday June 21st, the first day of summer, I awoke with one swollen eye. The next day, two swollen eyes. Yadda yadda yadda, I discovered I had poison ivy. The only place I had been where I could have gotten it was Central Park. I’m just sayin’ everyone who was making fun of the attack starting in Central Park better back off. It is a jungle of nature in there where even a city girl can get poison ivy… on her eyelids!

You know… plants have ways that they can attack.

(Image the happening originally uploaded by absolutwade)

Rotten tomatoes rating: 19%

Boy, Fracture has to be one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It is like the battle of who can maintain their accent for the least amount of time. Anthony Hopkins every once in a while has a super fake Irish accent and Ryan Gosling occasionally puts on a non-descript Southern accent. Do they write these movies first or just decide to make a movie around Anthony Hopkins? I feel like I have to spit just to get this bad taste from my mouth.

(image Fractured Concrete originally uploaded by Martin Isaac)

Rotten tomatoes rating: 71%

I’ve watched Disturbia a few times in the last couple of weeks.  The first time I was alone and scared.  The second time I was bored.  The third time I watched, I just yelled out George Washington every time the creepy serial killer neighbor played by David Morse Morse showed up.  David Morse plays George Washington in the new HBO “John Adams” miniseries.  I know actors have to play a lot of roles, but shouldn’t the casting agent put more thought into previous roles?   This is George Washington for goodness sakes… and David Morse has played creepy bad guys in 9 out of 10 movies (with one role as Abraham Lincoln, hmmmm).

(Image Disturbia originally uploaded by Christian – MBO)

Rotten tomatoes rating: 68%